Regrettably, I lived a life full of things I want to change. But it brought me here today. So I learned to let go. But most of all, I learned that nothing compares to grief.
Tag Archives: grief
Children’s Understanding of Grief
My godson caught me off guard with how he explained where his grandparents are. To him, it was just another version of the story. Maybe next time he’ll get with something else, until he’s old enough to understand. Children’s understanding of death and grief is the most heartbreaking oblivion there is.
I miss you dearly
Wind-chime laughter, apple slices set neatly on a plate. Primroses, rosaries, and fairy tales set in a nearby forest. A white horse, childhood anecdotes, and snarky comments. Wafers, herbs, crossword puzzles. Soup operas she’d brief us on as soon as we came in every time we visited. It’s Wednesday morning, and my brother is knockingContinueContinue reading “I miss you dearly”
March, Threes and Losses
My page crashed. I started drawing again. I lost my grandma. We’re in March. I turned 24. I started working on my thesis. I’m shutting the doors on these past four years. (I now measure time in leap-year portions – four by four by four.)25 is my favorite number. I’m pulling Destiny’s tongue by sayingContinueContinue reading “March, Threes and Losses”
Missing Out On Memories
Terminal. And love isn’t. Love is there after, long after. Love is so terrifying to me because it’s gigantic, intense, and everywhere, which makes everything so much more painful. Every second feels like missing out. Frozen in the moment, trying to freeze time, anxious to make memories last because, very soon, they’ll be all you’reContinueContinue reading “Missing Out On Memories”
Christmas 2023: No Lights in Bethlehem
Where I’m from, when we lose a loved one and are in mourning, we don’t decorate for Christmas. We don’t put up a tree, and we don’t play any music. On Christmas Eve, when everybody in the neighborhood goes from door to door in celebration, we skip the jolliness and singing in that house, andContinueContinue reading “Christmas 2023: No Lights in Bethlehem”
Big L: Love And Loneliness
Love and Loneliness I know I’ve been all about love on this page lately (I don’t know why. I was just inspired), but I also want to talk about loneliness. I’m not ready to talk about many things I should and said I would dedicate more space to. I just need time to process everything,ContinueContinue reading “Big L: Love And Loneliness”
Grandpa, Your Little Hawk Will Miss You Very Much!
I expected it with every phone call, so how did this one catch me by surprise? I don’t think my brain’s connected it yet, but I buried my grandpa on Monday. The inspiration behind the name of this blog, and I never actually told him I had a blog. I Miss My Grandpa Grandpa usedContinueContinue reading “Grandpa, Your Little Hawk Will Miss You Very Much!”
Grief is a thing with fetters
It’s one day ahead in the calendar, but it was Wednesday last year when I had this weird feeling that I needed to hug my friend when I waved her goodbye as she got on the bus. I don’t usually hug. Not that I don’t like it, it’s just not in my habit. So, anyway,ContinueContinue reading “Grief is a thing with fetters”
World Mental Health Day in my world
In lights of the World Mental Health Day – that I’m… not late to, because the conversation shouldn’t start and stop on that day – I wanted to share… let’s call it a diary entry, that I wrote in June of this year. I think I’m at that point again, in a way. I can’tContinueContinue reading “World Mental Health Day in my world”
My Little Hawk 