Whatever my relationship with the Church, my relationship with God is another thing. I’m full of anger. I put so much faith in Him to protect us, and I scream to Him to show His might.
In all my doubt and desperation, I scream to Him because I feel safe doing so.
I look for comfort, praying that He shows me that it will be alright. That this evil won’t win. She can’t win. It’s not fair.
While I was sorting out my grandma’s things after she passed, I found this book about saints. It’s from a Croatian author, and there’s this quote that goes:
“Oftentimes they painted saints as wax dolls. They were plucked out of life and immediately transported into an inaccessible realm of the supernatural. Thus they appeared to us as ethereal beings, strange, unreachable, and distant. We did not recognize our own blood in them.“
Saints were just humans. They made mistakes, fell, and doubted. And through that dark, their light now shines brighter.
God is Almighty. That is what I’ve been told all my life. So He should know if the test is worth it and if there is a purpose to all this.
Oftentimes, in my struggle with this external evil that frightens us, I go between denouncing God and compulsive devotion. I know it makes my faith look weak. I don’t care. This isn’t my confession. I wrestle with God a lot. It’s a push-and-pull relationship in which I’m breaking under this burden and trying to make sense of it.
If only my grandma were here now.
The other day, I made a comment to my mom. Don’t remember what it was. She said back, “It means someone is asking for your prayer”.
My grandma was devoted. Her faith was so pure. I believe her prayers still protect us. She is my compass and inspiration.
I lack strength. I don’t blame myself for it. Given the circumstances, I hold on well. But I wish I had a bit more of my grandma’s strength and security.
I’ll probably go my whole life searching for it.
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WHAT WILL YOU GAIN BY NOT PROTECTING YOUR PARTNER? — READ THIS CAREFULLY
What will you gain by constantly exposing your marriage to outsiders?
What will you gain by telling your family and friends about your partner’s weaknesses, mistakes, failures, and private struggles?
When you repeatedly expose your partner’s weaknesses to others, you may unintentionally give them reasons to disrespect your partner or look down on them.
Marriage requires privacy, loyalty, trust, and protection.
If you have a problem with your partner, learn to sit down together and talk about it. If you cannot resolve it yourselves, seek wise and trustworthy counsel—but don’t turn your partner’s private life into public information.
Not every disagreement needs to be announced to your family and friends.
Not every mistake your partner makes needs to become a topic of discussion.
Not every challenge in your marriage needs to be posted on social media.
Be careful who you allow into the private matters of your marriage. Some people may listen to your problems today, but tomorrow they may use those same things against your partner or your marriage.
And remember, cheating also opens the door for another person to enter a space that should be protected by commitment and faithfulness. Infidelity can cause deep emotional pain and create serious consequences for a relationship.
Being faithful is not only about avoiding another relationship. It is also about protecting the trust, dignity, and commitment you promised your partner.
#MarriageAdvice #HealthyMarriage #MarriageWisdom #RelationshipAdvice #ProtectYourMarriage
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My mother is quite religious I refuse to have faith in things I can’t prove. But to each their own and I can respect that. In my opinion if there is a god I will be forgiven when I say I didn’t know any better.😅
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Like my grandma – her faith was very pure and beautiful to witness. I get your point, and also, it is *your* relationship with faith and spirituality, whatever it may be. faith/religion can’t and shouldn’t be forced onto anyone. I was raised a catholic, but now I’d say I’m loosely religious because of my stance about Church, and like I say for you, same goes for me, ultimately, my relationship to faith/divine is between me and… that belief 🤷♀️
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👏👏👏
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But our lives are both embodied with strengths and weaknesses. It’s all okay. All my life, I’m dependent on Him.
Hugs, Katarina. This is very honest. The path photo is beautiful.
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Yes, like we discussed many times – ups and downs. Thank you, Hazel!
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My pleasure, katarina
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Many hugs!
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Many hugs back!🙏😇
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🤗🤗🤗
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Sweet friend, God sees your heart. He understands every fear. Every tear. Every doubt. Draw near to Him and He will draw near to you.
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Dear Jean, thank you for your kind words. There’s such calm in them. Thank you! 🤍
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This felt so honest and deeply personal. 🤍 The way you spoke about your grandma and the strength you still draw from her faith really touched me. Wishing you peace and strength, and I hope you always feel her presence guiding you. 🙏🦋✨
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Thank you! She really is everything to me 🤍Thank you, I hope so, too! ✨
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>>Oftentimes, in my struggle with this external evil that frightens us, I go between denouncing God and compulsive devotion. I know it makes my faith look weak. I don’t care. >>
This is so well expressed. We humans, if we see ourselves so clearly, are not consistent. If a relationship with faith is alive, there is some turbulence. How could there not be? I do wish you comfort, though.
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Thank you. It’s difficult to always have to uphold this image of stable strength, when in reality, as you said, we are humans, and out path isn’t linear. Thank you again ❤
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❤
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If it weren’t for God either I would have been insane or dead. A lot of painful things have happened to me. From divorce (first marriage) to death of my parents, to cancer, betrayal of my bestfriend and mentored students, aside from the daily bullying of people, and etc., but the only anchor i found myself clinging to is Jesus.
I have come to realize in life the author and creator of the universe knows all that is going on, He is still sovereign and good. It may have pained me that all these has happened to me and He doesnt need to explain to me why such thing happened because he is the creator, all were just gifts for me to experience and treasure. I thank him for the opportunity to have them for sometime but, I guess their part in my life is just upto that point, I still have a mission to do and until He calls me home, I will live to the fullest.
I miss them. Especially my parents but.. they will always be in my heart.
“I will continue to take care of you until you are old, until your hair becomes grey. I made you who you are, and I will supply everything that you need. I will carry you, and I will save you.”
Isaiah 46:4 EASY
I hold on to this promise when my heart aches. I know I am never alone. I have Him.
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Thank you for sharing this with me. I’m glad you found your anchor and safe haven in Him. Your faith is very beautiful! If you ever want to talk, I’m here.
Thank you, truly, for this!
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I will remember that. Thank you.
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🩷🩷🩷
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